Unashamed Love for God

Stop Holding On and Just Be Held

Posted on by Hannah Banana

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Much thinking about the ‘fear’ of ‘big xyz’ falling where it may and letting the dust settle…Then I remember that I have a hope that isn’t meant to be kept silent or to myself, but shared person to person…

I have done my part and then some as a citizen of the united states IE. writing letters, calling people, being encouraging when I wrote and when I called but also presenting issues and what I believe to be the solution to them and wishing blessing from God onto those I wrote or called…

I still continue to do my part, but often am called ‘higher’ as a citizen of Heaven first and foremost…

Lately I’ve been in a funk, more lethargic then usual and the fight to even get out of bed has been difficult in the last two weeks, and I realize that when the basic things become a fight, that in my own strength I cannot take another step…

But allowing myself to be held by God and let go of the things that I am trying to keep together, but allow them to fall into place in God’s arms…

Isn’t it funny when you make the effort to truly change for the better that the uphill climb and the ‘get up and fight’ some days is just not there…

That lets me know that something is correct and to lean on the Lord even more…

This is a bit of an unguided ramble post and honestly I’ve been out of energy in the last few days…

refreshing comes from God and Him alone, and many days it’s minute by minute…

Let the pieces fall where they may and fall into the bed of grace God has prepared for you,

make time for God and fight for that time because once you get alone with God and even give an effort that is not that much when you don’t have the fight in you, He will lift you up to be refreshed (take as long as you need.)

Prayers for energy to get into God’s presence daily would be greatly appreciated… 

Thank you bloggers 🙂

From the bottom of my being I hope that each one of you find, discover and uncover the God of Israel, come to the knowledge and the Truth of Him who so loves you He gave of His life to totally change radically alter history and radically alter your own future into something that becomes beauty from the ashes you have now…

Oh!

Posted on by Hannah Banana

Oh Lovely, Beautiful Light.

Holy of Holy’s in line of sight.

Heavy Glory-that falls and runs.

Sweet Spirit-Precious Son.

Oil of Joy for pain exchanged.

Name above every name.

Locked garden of my Beloved,

Water-Wine,

We are One.

 

Taste of God

Posted on by Hannah Banana

God’s Love has a palate!

It flavors like a chosen fruit, full of zest, range, and syrupiness.

The biting perception of the world, is curved into admiration for God.

His affection has a sensitivity – take and consume of it, party in it, adore it!

The aftertaste of His kind core is outside explanation!

We don’t live and move and have our being in bread only, but in Every Word that originates from the Mouth of God!

To God Only

Posted on by Hannah Banana

Well, I have my voice back and funny enough I want to praise God with renewed vigorous zeal…

Am I a zelout? Yup, I am.

Am I in love with God? You Bet!

Am I a glutton for His presence?  Yes! 

I feel giddy, like a kid with a shiny new twig toy only in the kids eyes it’s a doll…

I love the God who gifted me with writing, with expression, with a voice, with compassion, with courage that only can be explained through and by God.

None of these things I did to earn, I just happen to have them as gifts!

What better way to express my heart to God’s Heart, heart to heart…

Then to use these gifts in silver and gold, and sing with my entire being, write with all that I am, use the wrapped lovelies for the lover of my soul?!

It’s funny that my voice would come back on Friday Shabbat, the sixth day of Hanukkah, and I am so overcome with amazement…

Each day in the quiet (forced due to the lost voice) I ‘was still and knew that He is God’

at one point I couldn’t hear (ear infection) and my eyes had pink eye…

It was misabural, yet in those moments in those days that I was at my physical worst…

I fell in love with God again…

My heart became and is that much more tender and aware…

to not take for granted, sight, hearing, and singing…

And to choose in love for God, to n0t listen to, sing, or see things that are spitting in the face of the One who gives these senses…

Garbage in garbage out is very true.

Thankfulness has been the thing to keep myself afloat…Only when I was weary, at my worst…Physically broken, not singing sucked…

Then the thought of: well what would you sing now if you could Hannah? (to myself I thought, well a freaking angry girl song) eh, not the best use of your voice, though your voice express it in beauty? (no, you’re right God.)

Many inner ‘talks’ with the Father God, and a humbling realization that yes Lord, I will only lift You up…not my issues up, not my gift up in self glorification…

Same with the music, movies etc…I watch and listen to…

So dear readers, in love I type all of this to say…

God is beyond anything I could sing, write, etc…there isn’t an ‘I’ in the story of Yeshua, it is indeed all about, and for Him, my story weaves it’s way into His…

But it makes a beautiful tapestry doesn’t it?  🙂

“If you lift up your voices, and call on the Lord He will come, and the nations will see that salvation comes from Zion.” -Watchmen lyrics from Paul Wilber

 

 

Human, and Yet

Posted on by Hannah Banana

Funny how there can be things that beset me as I walk along in this faith walk…

I struggle with saying things before I think, which not having a voice has put a stop to and caused me to give thought before I say anything…

I struggle with reading online smut, really it’s the drawing away of my affections and time to a fictional love that is ‘safe’ but a waste of my efforts…

I know this, the appeal has been less so, I want to be so sold out for God that it follows me around in the air…

I don’t want to lose my connection with God, and so a lifestyle of repentance on repeat is actually what I am learning is normal while on this side of time…the flesh, what I want, actively wars with what God wills…but God has overcome the world, and as I yield to Him more, it gets easier…

I don’t want to waste my love on anything less then the Lord, He is the only one deserving of my everything…

I want to be sold out for God, that He is all I live for, I want my soul to so dance for God as David danced before ADONAI:

Now King David was told, “The Lord has blessed the household of Obed-Edom and everything he has, because of the ark of God.” So David went to bring up the ark of God from the house of Obed-Edom to the City of David with rejoicing. When those who were carrying the ark of the Lord had taken six steps, he sacrificed a bull and a fattened calf. Wearing a linen ephod, David was dancing before the Lord with all his might, while he and all Israel were bringing up the ark of the Lord with shout and the sound of trumpets.  2 Samuel 6:12-15

Unabashed don’t care what others think, flat out worship to God…

That is what I want…

In fact, David was so passionate about his worship that this happened:

As the ark of the Lord was entering the City of David, Michal daughter of Saul watched from a window. And when she saw King David leaping and dancing before the Lord, she despised him in her heart.

When David returned home to bless his household, Michal daughter of Saul came out to meet him and said, “How the king of Israel has distinguished himself today, going around half-naked in full view of the slave girls of his servants as any vulgar fellow would!”

David said to Michal, “It was before the Lord, who chose me rather than your father or anyone from his house when he appointed me ruler over the Lord’s people Israel—I will celebrate before the Lord. I will become even more undignified than this, and I will be humiliated in my own eyes. But by these slave girls you spoke of, I will be held in honor.”

And Michal daughter of Saul had no children to the day of her death.

2 Samuel 6:16, 20-23

May this so happen to me, may I so worship the Lord that it causes envy in the hearts of others!

I love this story because David is frankly so in love with God, that a forever documented account of David’s love for God and the bitterness of his wife are written in the Scriptures.

I’m not alone in the struggle, and the fight…But, readers I figured I’d share, because it’s who I am…

Love you guys, stay blessed…

An Interjection

Posted on by Hannah Banana

Acts of Kindness,

Open eyes of blindness.

 

A cohort of power,

Civic foul hour.

 

Party-political opinion,

Lifeblood ideal pinion.

 

Oh cost, someplace gash?

Oh measure, spiteful lash!

 

Do they not care?

Do they not dare?

 

Please, don’t ask of news,

Anarcho-syndicalist red hues.

 

I standpoint temperance,

Or all at one.

 

I stand for Nazarene,

And fall for none.

An Explosive God (in a good way)

Posted on by Hannah Banana

I love this song!

I love the way God has captured Paul’s heart with the lyrics within, it just screams ‘God I love you!’ 

One day I’m going to sing this song, cover it if you will. I love singing to God, praises to Him, just loving on Him at His feet. There really isn’t any better place to be then at God’s feet.

Praise report: God is helping me come off and transition onto my new anti-depressant! that is a huge deal, I’ve been taking this stuff for 7 years, It’s a miracle!

A miracle is an event not explicable by natural or scientific laws. Such an event may be attributed to a supernatural being.

The supernatural being of ADONAI has also healed the bunion in my left foot!

God is just too good beyond words, beyond anything I could type out.

The only thing I think of is: ‘They overcame by the Blood of the Lamb and the word of their testimony, even unto death’

God is very much alive and active, and very much is still healing! Praise God! I love Him just I feel as though I could just explode with praise or something… 😛

Hope this blesses you all.