The Parable of the Puppy Part 1

Once there was a very loving girl who sold all she had to buy a puppy. Day one was exciting but by the evening Hannah was exhausted. Bella was a lovely puppy and afraid her first few days and nights in a new place that she was not familiar with.

Hannah patiently and positively kept encouraging Bella and kept cleaning up messes armed with more than 600 poopy bags Hannah was prepared to help Bella learn how to poop outside and not in her new home.

For you see when we are God’s Children spiritually He potty trains us, He picks up after our messes and mistakes many of which we wonder if we’ll ever make it from milk to meat, from pooping inside God’s House or by ‘casting all our poops upon Him because He cares for us.’

The Bible deals much with poop in fact when Israel sinned God often compared Israel’s unfaithfulness to poop, like a bad smell burning in His Nostrils. They never were housebroken out of stiffnecked pride. So God gave them over to a harsh and hateful kingdom. In the same way, these growing pains with Bella are only for a season.

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Bella my new puppy dog

Virtue and Vice

Virtue and vice many shaped sizes. Depression paces round about my head. The corridors that light spaces and caverns tell of once occupied rooms. I am not a haunted house I am one that struggles with former tenants screaming lies until I cannot hear myself think.

My home is occupied by the Holy Spirit and I am a slave girl of Almighty God. He is indeed the Lover of my soul. I must be doing something right for the advancement of the Kingdom of ADONAI. I am praying for the salvation of George Soros. And bless him and the works of his hands.

The powers of darkness quiet clearly hate this, and as such have launched an offensive to my own offensive.

Yeshua said, blessed are you when you pray for those who persecute you, who revile you and who hate you. In a way, Soros does hate the God I serve, but God so loves all of us that any who give their lives unto Him will be saved.

There are degrees of where we will be in heaven. Yeshua said Blessed are those who teach the truth and show others to do likewise for they shall be called great in the Kingdom of Heaven. But those who teach error, and show others how to error will be least in the Kingdom of Heaven.

We were not made for hell, but we go on as energy forever so our choice to be with God or not remains in our hands while we draw breath.

The world travails around me and it would be easy to go with that tossed tied.

But even in the darkest corners of my mind as I give those areas to God, He is the Rock Higher than I and to Him night is as the day.

I might struggle and strain, but through this pit of despair, I have my hope in God alone.

Jane Hamon Prophesy at Mercy Multiplied on Feb. 2, 2013

In truth Hannah, you are someone who knows how to make people laugh, how to break down walls. You are filled with Joy and daughter in truth that is how I’ve called you to be. The Lord says you have this nature about you that just disarms people. The other part of you feels as though it wars against you. For that, it angers you.

And you do not know what to do with that anger. At times you feel this rage inside of you that bubbles up and takes your joy. I want you to know, Says the Lord, I’ve been dealing with that time bomb.

Sometimes you’re even afraid of yourself. But, I’m disarming that time bomb and I am setting you free from a lifetime of anger and a life time of injustice. Says the Lord. That makes you angry and guess what, that makes Me angry as well! You can be angry, but not stay angry.

You felt anger was a wall and shield to you, but guess what? We have been disarming that wall haven’t we?! I’m delivering you from an inner anger and an inner rage at times the parts of yourself that you have hated you have ended up angry at yourself and Me. (God) and those around you.

This causes you to feel disarmed because you wonder how can I be so joyful and so angry at the same time?! I bring the peace that you will not just understand in your mind but one that ‘passes all understanding’ you are not going to have to understand it all to receive it all.

This has been a ‘sticking point’ for you. But why? (3x’s) I’m going to turn your question marks into exclamation points! You have a teaching gift and the importation of knowledge and the education process I’m restoring to you the years that were ‘eaten up’ by the enemy’s devastation in your schooling years. I’m restoring your love of learning, books because I have put the heart of a teacher in you.

You will teach in classrooms and also in living-rooms. You will not be afraid to sit around couches with people. As you share and impart you will tear down walls in other people’s lives.

You will be taken into churches through they were not always your ‘friend’ for a little while, I will bring people into your life that will make a way for you. Out of the place I’ve been teaching you, I will give you importation to share My Word and principles. You will have keys in your hands that will unlock others from the prisons they’ve been in.

I will restore you so that you can be a restorer, I will heal you so that you can be a healer, and I will teach you so that you can be a teacher. Everything I do for you I will do through you.

I’m breaking you out of the place of shame that the enemy has tried to keep you in. First of all, it hasn’t worked! I will cause you to feel good about yourself to feel good in your own skin. You’re getting a sassy new haircut, along with a sassy attitude. This is an external transformation of an internal transformation.

You will hold your head high and walk into a room whereas before you hoped no one would see you. Now you will walk in and ‘say’ see me, I have something to say.

You will have a ‘bad’ good attitude that will open people’s hearts. Don’t worry daughter too much about what your family thinks your transformation ‘should’ look like, but what I think it should be. (Says the Lord)

I don’t in any way want you to feel stunted by that. You will emerge like a rose, where all you’ve seen are the thorns. There is a rose attached at the end of them.

A new dog

We adopted our 1st dog in 2002, a Brittany Spaniel,as a present for our son, Jonathan, for his 10th birthday. Little did we know that Minnie would be part of our oldest daughter’s healing as she struggled through more than a decade of anxiety, depression, an eating disorder, self- harm and an eventual diagnosis of high functioning autism. Minnie was her best friend and our families “ therapy dog”. She lived a full life and endeared herself to even the most hesitant of animal lovers. She was truly our 6th family member. Last summer,we sadly said goodbye to her and have grieved her loss for the past 18 months. As Hannah has moved through the stages of her healing and growth, she has come to realize that her love for her dogs is one way she relates to and connects with other living things ( humans). Having a dog has also reduced her anxiety and depression. Unfortunately, with Kim in school full time and Larry starting his own business,we can not afford to fund her adoption expenses. Can you help make her adoption dreams come true? We found a wonderful Brittany breeder near Charlottesville, VA and he has several Brittany’s up for adoption at $600/male and $650/ female. She has stated, “ I don’t want anything else for Christmas, Hanukkah and my Birthday for the next several years but a dog!”

Hannah’s Dog Gofundme

Gastric Sleeve

On the 31st of October 2017, I had a sleeve gastrectomy done.

This was after two years of deliberation and after 10 months of kickboxing.

When they reached my organs there wasn’t any fat in my liver or organs! That working out did something, it got me in shape to heal better and be prepared mentally and physically for this journey.

Granted I’ve gone from 100 mph to 10 mph if that, but it was 2/3’s my stomach removed for good.

This is a tool, a very powerful weight loss tool. It’s not the ‘easy way out’ nor is it a ‘cure all’ 10 years down the line I will be the 1 out of 6 that does not regain the weight because I’ve done the hard work beforehand.

It’s got to come from within you, the choice to live well.

The choice to say yes to not going overboard, the choice to not give up even after all else has been exhausted.

I did all I could in my power to get this weight off and didn’t come by this choice to have surgery overnight. And I’m glad I didn’t, it gave it time to sink into my bones the choice to choose health for life. 

I will say that God has been by my side to help me as I’ve been healing, it’s been hellish somedays. But on the whole, I’m day 17 post op and feeling more myself daily.

It’s weird to not workout like I used to but again I’ll get there this isn’t about a sprint but about healing well and getting good eating habits in place.

Heck good habits and attitudes in place.

The first year is like training wheels for your stomach and all else, it’s not a cake walk.

No carbs for the 1st six months to maximise weight loss. No fruit, 64 oz. of water a day, protein shakes to start off with and now I’m in the soft mush food stage.

100 grams of protein daily, 2 multivitamins, 3 calcium chews, b12 and biotin sublingual. It’s hard work after the ‘wow you’ve lost so much weight’ fades away and things return ‘to normal’ where is ‘my new normal’?

So as I’m finding my balance in this dizziness I just thought I’d update on how I’ve been doing. Pretty damn well, God is good and yielding to what He has for my life will continue to produce fruit. Taste and see that He is indeed Good. 

Past Self

I’m the pretty thing that time forgot, I’ve been left to sing and rot.

I unmarked, the one you miss, I’m the closing clawing fist.

I’m a soul to those of foe, once seen back to and fro.

Deuce deranged, tetrad missed.

Wailing mess, silent twist.

Remember the time, we use to dance?

You the stab and I the chance?

Shredded arms in shifting skin;

Dressing gown of braided sin.

Yes you the thing that I forgot,

You the act unlearned, untaught.

Lovely One

Tussled bed sheets, a smile with praise that drips as honey from my mouth.

Lord most High and Lauded One, most affectionately tender, sweetly bold in Your zeal over my heart.

Your Hands caress my heart, I see in my mind’s eye, You reclining beside me.

I see Your Hands stroke my mouth, ‘sing my darling only songs to Me.’

So envious yet gracious Your Eyes are; They have a Fierce Fire in them and yet in the dark they clear my face.

You are aglow about me.

As written by David: “Let His faithful followers erupt in praise, singing triumphantly wherever they are, even as they lie down for sleep in the evening.” Psalm 149:5

There are not any words to draw the way in which you extract my praise, the way you make love to me, the way you capture and enclose my heart, the way I climax in your Spirit.

As Paul put “he was caught up to heaven and heard things so astounding that they couldn’t be uttered in language, things no earth-born is allowed to express.” 2 Corinthians 12:4

I’ve seen the heavens and the praises of You God lifted high and above, Your trio seats and yet so much more in my mind’s eye.

Indeed, Lord, You are my lover.

My bosom is ruined for You alone.

I Tire of You

I’ll knit some tubing to,

Drain your Blotto fumes.

I’ll sort savage tidings,

From your forked falsehoods.

Vessels of hell dust,

First blood’s drawn.

Bottles slogged,

Askew and fall.

Bitterness your fact,

Regurgitate lack.

Your self-justification,

Torrent of cop outs.

Return like a man,

And shut your rancid mouth.